In this edition of Guest Post, I introduce Val. Val is the mother of six kids who she raised in the seventies and eighties, which she discusses in today’s guest post. Val enjoys crocheting blankets and scarves. If you are interested in her blankets, you can email her a firstname.lastname@example.org.
I married for the first time at the age of 20 in April of 1975. I had my first son in April of 1976 when I was 21. I had my second son in August of 1978 and I had my third son in November of 1979. We divorced in October 1981.
I married for the second time in November of 1982. A week later our first son was born December of 1982, (my fourth child). I had our second son in March of 1985, (my fifth child). I had our only daughter in April of 1986, (my sixth child). We divorced in June of 2000, (but separated in October of 1998).
Raising my children during the seventies and eighties was totally different than raising children now. We had computers but nothing like now. Computers then were mainly used by businesses and the military. We certainly had no access to apps or any kind of browser search, (Google, Bing, Yahoo, etc.}
I personally had no support from my family and I didn’t have a lot of friends. If I asked for any kind of help or support, I always got the same answer from my Mother. ‘’Deal With It,’’ or ‘’After you move out to be on your own, you’re no longer our responsibility.’’
Husbands, friends and family behaved very differently back in the seventies & eighties. Husbands believed it was their job to feed, clothe, and put a roof over his family’s heads, not to help take care of the children; especially when it came time to change baby’s diaper, give baby their bottle, or bath. According to society back then, it was the mother’s job to do all those things. That also included taking baby out for a walk in their stroller or carriage, or taking baby to the lake, the Park, or to the beach.
I struggled everyday. I also struggled with my self-confidence and low self-esteem. My dad was verbally abusive when I was a teenager. After he retired in 1970 from the Air Force, he began drinking heavily. Eventually he became an alcoholic. So after putting me down and telling me I’d never amount to anything, I’d never be a good mother and my kids would all hate me, I believed it.
After marrying and divorcing twice, losing my kids in both divorces, my father still has to have ‘’the last word”; even from his Grave!
My Mom never told me what to expect if I got married or had kids. I guess you could call it on the job training.
In spite of all my mistakes, knowing I had or might have ‘’failed’’ my children, I know they are doing well.
I guess in conclusion you can say that it was tough raising kids in the seventies and eighties was not easy!